Simple expression has the same advantage over flowery language as a simple and artistic room has over a room filled with gaudy, inharmonious embellishments. One is effective, the other defective. And yet to express ideas simply and correctly, with a regard for polish and poise, one must have a good command of the language.
Make a resolve, right now, that you will never use a foreign word when you can give its meaning in English. And also determine now, definitely, that no matter how popular slang becomes in the less refined circles of society, you will never use it because you know that it is the badge of vulgarity.
There is nothing quite as beautiful as good, simple English, when it is spoken correctly.
There is nothing quite as beautiful as good, simple English, when it is spoken correctly.
To know the right word in the right place, to know its correct pronunciation and spelling, there is nothing more valuable than a good standard dictionary. If you haven't one-a new revised edition-get one right away. You can not hope to become a pleasing conversationalist until you own and use a good dictionary.
An excellent way to increase your vocabulary and perfect your speech is to talk less, and listen politely while others lead the conversation. There's a lot of truth in that old maxim, "Speech is silver, but silence is gold!"
INTERRUPTING THE SPEECH OF OTHERS
It was mentioned previously that the Sioux youth does not speak until he is first spoken to. This is also true of the young Armenian woman. She would be horrified at the idea of addressing a woman older than herself, unless first spoken to. Many other countries observe these courtesies of speech, with a wholesome effect upon the general culture of the people.
How often, here in our own country, even in the most highly cultivated society, do we hear a man or woman carelessly interrupt the conversation of another, perhaps an older person, without so much as an apology! It is bad form, to say the least, but it is also distinctly rude.
No person of good breeding will interrupt the conversation of another no matter how startling and remarkable an idea he may have. It will be just as startling and remarkable a few minutes later, and the speaker will have gained poise and confidence in the time that he waits for the chance to speak.
Whispering in company is another bad habit that must be avoided. The drawing-room or reception room is no place for personal secrets or hidden bits of gossip. The man or woman commits a serious breach in good conduct by drawing one or two persons aside and whispering something to them.
TACT IN CONVERSATION
Be careful not to give too strong an expression of your likes and dislikes. To master this important point of speech, it is wise to examine carefully and frankly all your opinions before expressing them in words. It is necessary that you understand yourself, before you are able to make others understand you.
In carrying on a conversation in a public place be sure to keep the voice modulated and do not mention the names of people about whom you are talking in such a way that anyone overhearing the conversation by chance could identify them. It is best to avoid all personal talk when one is in public.
The person who is always trying to set other people right does not use tact. If they wanted assistance, they would probably ask. People are sensitive, and they do not like to have their shortcomings commented upon by others.
Ask questions only if you are gifted with great tact. Otherwise you are bound to create embarrassing situations. If you do ask questions, make them of a general character, rather than personal. But never be curious, because people resent inquisitiveness--and rightly so, for it is a very undesirable trait to have, and each person has a right to privacy.
Never talk for mere talking's sake. Speak only when you have something to say, and then talk quietly, deliberately and with sincerity. Never criticise, antagonise or moralise and your company will be sought by everyone.
SOME IMPORTANT INFORMATION
If you mumble over your words and have difficulty in pronouncing clearly, you will find it a great help to talk very slowly and take deep breaths between each two or three words. For stammering, deep breathing is also suggested before uttering the words upon which one is most likely to come to grief.
Self-consciousness is the result of exaggerated humility. If you concentrate upon what you are saying, and forget all about how you are saying it, you will forget your shyness. Respect yourself, have confidence in yourself-and nervousness and shyness in conversation will vanish.
Lisping is a matter of defective speech, and although reading aloud and dramatic recitations help, it is best to consult a specialist if ordinary methods fail to prevent it. Such habits as hesitation, coughing, or groping for a word, are often forms of nervousness and a little will-power exerted in the right direction may easily control them.
Above all, be simple and be sincere. Let interest in your subject lend animation to your face and manner. Do not attempt to make yourself appear brilliant and inspired, for you will only succeed in making yourself ridiculous. Be modest, pleasant, agreeable and sympathetic, and you will find that you win the immediate response of your audience, whether it consists of two people or two hundred people.
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